It is one of those conversation starters that pops out on my first dates, mostly out of ignorance, infrequently from curiosity and few use it as sympathize approach to break in. I quickly skip that part of the question by saying.. ‘it is getting better, it is not as hard as it used to be.’
It has been three years since I left bangalore and I hear from friends that there is a bar that does a gay night or something similar and I am sure there are private parties that go on.. Given that it is still illegal to indulge in homosexual acts in public and given that the law doesn’t protect against homophobic activities, thats a lot of progress.
Of course there are help lines and NGO organizations and “Good As You”.
I was one of those who grew up a Christian and under the impression that homosexuality is a sin. Fighting the state of denial and constantly reasoning my mind to accept it without feeling guilty. I had no idea that only few guys had homosexual tendencies. There were times in my college, when I would get jealous of my straight best friend hanging out with other guys. And he had no idea why I was jealous..
Internet certainly helped to find other gay guys in bangalore to hang out with (most of the times it was for sex), but some turned out to be my best pals till date. From non-existence to living a queer life it took me a couple of years.. When I first came to bangalore I had all these confusions to sort out but the day before I left bangalore, I was hanging out with a bunch of gay friends I made over those years..
Hanging out in the malls, watching those movies together, going to temples, walking down the streets and frequenting the diners and ice cream parlors. Having friends and being with them made a lot of difference in the whole coming out process..